**FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: The ‘Glitch’ Vote**

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: The ‘Glitch’ Vote

MATRIX ALERT: MASSIE PRIMARY RESULTS DEFY LOCAL LOGIC

Frankfort, KY – In what analysts are calling a “statistical fractal anomaly,” the Republican primary for Kentucky’s 4th Congressional District has produced a result that local data scientists claim is geometrically impossible under normal conditions.

Incumbent Thomas Massie won by a landslide—94.3% of the vote. The glitch? Zero. Point. Zero.

According to precinct-level data pulled from the state’s secured servers, exactly 1,447 voters in the rural sub-precinct of Mount Olivet cast a ballot for “Write-In: Mickey Mouse.”

The problem? The precinct only has 1,402 registered voters.

“The raw numbers are the matrix equivalent of a floating chair,” said Dr. Elena Vance, a data integrity analyst with the nonpartisan Election Science Institute. “There are 45 more votes than people in that box. But here’s the kicker—when you run a synchronicity check, the ‘Mickey’ write-in percentage perfectly mirrors the exact ratio of disenfranchised voters who moved out of that ZIP code in 2023.”

The state board has no comment. Officials have blamed a “typographical echo in the CSV.”

“This isn’t voter fraud,” Vance added. “This is a loophole in the simulation’s consent mechanism. It looks like someone hit ‘Ctrl+Z’ on the 2020 census, and the universe just… agreed.”

As of press time, Mickey Mouse has not conceded.